Hello--for some of you reading this first blog entry, you are intimately familiar with my story. Others may only have bits and pieces of it and still others may be reading this for the first time because you have just found out that Jennifer has breast cancer. I decided to start this blog as a way of keeping family and friends, near and far, in the loop with respect to the diagnosis, prognosis, and treatment options available to me as I move through the stages of cancer treatment. I know that there are wonderful pages, like Caring Bridge, dedicated to patients going through serious and in some cases terminal illness.
But after looking at them, I decided that since I already have been blogging for a few years, I was more comfortable with this format. And I think it is in keeping with the personal motto I've developed for myself from the moment I started to walk in and out of doctor's offices at the UNC Lineberger Cancer Center: NO FUCKING PINK RIBBONS. I hate those suckers. First of all, I HATE the color pink--I own one hot pink shirt from Ann Taylor (an attempt to get in touch with my feminine side a few years ago) and I'm not sure that I can wear that shirt anymore now because I just feel marked by the color pink.
Don't get me wrong--the Susan Komen foundation and other organizations who use the pink ribbon as a tool to galvanize fund raising for research and support is wonderful. And I know women who embrace the pink ribbon and see it as a source of strength and inspiration. So I don't want to take away from the power of the symbol for others.
I'm just saying, for ME? Not going to work. And I refuse to be marked by the pink ribbon or by the cancer. I refuse the rhetoric and the marketing and branding that the pink ribbon signifies (and ah, yes, I am still an academic to the core and overanalyzing that little piece of fabric). So I thought an apt title for this blog as well as a motto for the way I'm approaching the cancer is NFPR: No Fucking Pink Ribbons. I don't want pity, I don't want platitudes. But I would love your support and encouragement and strength and resources (and in some cases I may literally need your help) as I move through this process.
OK, enough. The next post will be the saga so far. Feel free to keep reading or not--that's the great thing about blogs, you can dip in and out. And feel free to leave a comment or ask questions. I've got a team of friends who are also signed on as co-bloggers who may be writing and posting from time to time when I lack the will or energy to update folks.